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Are You Sensitive in a Right Way?

THERE are both wrong and right ways of being sensitive. Being sensitive in a wrong way is a weakness, a sign of immaturity, a definite liability. Being sensitive in a right way demonstrates strength, is a sign of maturity.

We continually meet up with people who are sensitive in a wrong way. Such sensitiveness is sometimes called touchiness. Thus some persons are touchy when it comes to their appearance, because they happen to be overweight or because they limp or have some facial defect.

Others, again, are sensitive because of their nationality or race or the color of their skin. As a result, their friends and acquaintances lean over backward, as it were, so as not to give them any grounds for feeling slighted or ignored. By being sensitive or touchy they call attention to the very thing that they would have others ignore. If they forgot the matter, doubtless others would also.

Then, again, it is a common failing to be extremely sensitive to correction or criticism. Often employees or students are very touchy about any suggestion of discipline. No doubt one reason why the Bible so strongly stresses the need for discipline is that the human tendency is to resent it, to shrink from it because of touchiness. Literally scores of times the Bible calls attention to the value of discipline. Thus we read: “Take hold on discipline; do not let go. Safeguard it, for it itself is your life.” “The reproofs of discipline are the way of life.” “Listen to discipline and become wise.” Yes, the wise person is not touchy when receiving correction.​—Prov. 4:13; 6:23; 8:33.

King David of ancient Israel was a wise man in this regard. In one of his psalms he says: “Should the righteous one strike me, it would be a loving-kindness; and should he reprove me, it would be oil upon the head, which my head would not want to refuse.” (Ps. 141:5) And not only did he say that, but he lived by those words. On several occasions he was reproved for taking a wrong course, but at no time did he resent it. His son, King Solomon, expressed similar sentiments in one of his proverbs, saying: “Open reproof is better than love concealed. The blows a friend gives are well meant.”​—Prov. 27:5, 6, The New English Bible.

Ironically, so often it is the one who is very sensitive as to his own feelings that is lacking in sensitivity toward another person’s feelings and so rides roughshod over others. Such a one may be unable to stand any criticism but will freely criticize others. An extreme case was Adolf Hitler. It is reported that he brooked no dissent or criticism on the part of his associates, his underlings, or, for that matter, on the part of anyone. Yet he was devastating in his criticism of others. Not only could he calmly ordain the murder of millions of innocent Jews, but he took pleasure in seeing these and other foes tortured. Thus he not only had the conspirators on his life fiendishly tortured, but had movies made of their agonies for his own enjoyment. Truly, being highly sensitive as to one’s own feelings but wholly insensitive to the feelings of others is a bad combination.

How does the right kind of sensitivity manifest itself? One way this can be illustrated is in the field of the arts. A fine musician is sensitive as to the beauties of sound, melody and harmony. An artist that works with a brush is sensitive to the various nuances of light and shade, of colors and of form. To the extent that these artists are sensitive to such outside stimulation, to that extent they bring happiness to themselves and others.

So, too, persons can be alert and sensitive in their observations of others around them. Such sensitivity may manifest itself in compassionate neighbor love. In the Biblical illustration of the “good Samaritan” both a priest and a Levite lacked this kind of sensitivity. Without the slightest feeling of compassion they could ignore a man lying by the roadside who had been beaten and robbed. But the “good Samaritan” had this sensitivity; he had empathy, he had fellow feeling. He showed this by doing all that he could to bring relief to the victim of the robbers.​—Luke 10:29-37.

Jesus himself had this compassionate sensitivity. Thus we read that on one occasion he was filled with indignation, “being thoroughly grieved at the insensibility of [the] hearts” of the sticklers for the sabbath who would rather see a man suffer than see him healed on the sabbath.​—Mark 3:1-5.

Yes, Jesus “felt pity for [his people], because they were skinned and thrown about like sheep without a shepherd.” (Matt. 9:36) He devoted his life to serving their needs. And he commissioned his apostles to do the same, saying: “As you go, preach, saying, ‘The kingdom of the heavens has drawn near.’ Cure sick people, raise up dead persons, make lepers clean, expel demons. You received free, give free.”​—Matt. 10:7, 8.

Another right kind of sensitivity has to do with our consciences. Due to the wickedness of this system of things and inborn selfishness, ever so many people “walk in the unprofitableness of their minds, . . . because of the insensibility of their hearts. Having come to be past all moral sense, they gave themselves over to loose conduct to work uncleanness of every sort with greediness.” All such no longer have a sensitive conscience. Rather, they are “marked in their conscience as with a branding iron.” If we ignore the promptings of our conscience in little matters, we can become more and more careless, with the result that we will find ourselves committing gross sins.​—Eph. 4:17-19; 1 Tim. 4:2.

Still another facet of the right kind of sensitivity is that which has been termed sensitive mental perception. It is a keen discernment as to the best course of action to take under given circumstances. It is the peculiar ability to deal with others without giving offense, because of being sensitive to the moods and thinking of others. A sensitive person can detect such by observing little things, such as the facial expression, the tone of voice, the person’s stance or even the way that he is dressed. Those dealing with mentally disturbed persons ought to have this sensitive mental perception and so should all Christians who would preach and teach the good news of God’s kingdom effectively to others.

Truly there are many facets to this matter of being sensitive. To be sensitive in the wrong way may at times be merely a matter of thoughtlessness. But more often it is a weakness, if not also a manifestation of selfishness, as in being insensitive to the needs or plight of others. Being sensitive in a right way is the course of wisdom and is prompted or made possible by empathy, fellow feeling, love.