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A Long Journey in Search of a Stranger

WHO am I? Why are we here? Where are we going? My head was spinning with questions about life as I knelt for the last time in the Catholic church that I had attended loyally in Canada since I was six years old.

As I left the church, solemn in my resolve never to return, it was to begin a long journey in search of a stranger. Someone or something, I felt, could surely fill the emptiness inside of me.

However, at the age of 16 I did not know where to look. And as months and years crawled by, they felt like centuries. Life beckoned to me, but in what form? One way was with the apathetic, alcohol-partying crowd where a girl of my years faced the very real prospect of an unwanted pregnancy. Or I might choose the new, seemingly mind-expanding drug crowd. Since they were disillusioned by the “establishment,” I felt more drawn to them.

At my mother’s insistence, I entered a university. At first it was exciting. Professors and students were eager to tear down the system. But what better system did they offer to replace it? None. Indeed, I began to wonder if the “hippie” crowd was degenerating into a worse system than the one they despised.

Emptiness kept crowding in on me. It was matched only by the urge to search on for answers. One professor, sensing this unhappiness, suggested that I might find fulfillment in studying languages abroad.

Searching into Other Religions

Europe was filled with young people having nothing better to believe in than we had. So the popular fad of the time was to explore Oriental religions. Hopefully, I began to examine Hinduism and Buddhism.

As I visited one country after another, I was awed by the beauty of it all. I thought: If there is a God, he would not have to change much to turn the earth into a paradise. What, especially, would he have to change? Us. Human nature.

Reflections of that kind were fed upon by others of a saddening kind: How short life is! How much there is to see and to know and to enjoy! Why must it be that life is so short? So unrewarding?

The turquoise waters of the Mediterranean glistened in the sunlight as the ship cruised through the Strait of Gibraltar bound for Morocco. Shortly, we were in Tangiers. Veiled women and turbaned men rushed to and fro. I was here to seek direct contact with one more religion​—Islam. A young Parisian artist had persuaded me that I would find answers here.

Moslems did seem sincere. Five times a day they prostrated themselves on the ground to Allah. I was introduced to the Koran, the holy book of the Moslems. However, among other things, I discovered that polygamy was permitted in their religion. Also, violence, bloodshed and wars were common to the Moslem world. I could not see this as being any better than the record of Christendom. It was plain that my search was not going to end here.

I was sick at heart. There seemed no way for me but to return home to Canada. I came back saddened, but little wiser. Whatever I was searching for was no nearer than before.

Unexpected Help

Defeated, I resolved to settle down, get a job and try to fit in. Having learned French in my travels, I became a bilingual receptionist for the government. I tried to mix in with the interests and affairs of those around me. But why was it torture to sit through coffee breaks listening to gossip?

One woman in the office did seem very different. Lorraine was quiet and unassuming. Her sense of apartness seemed to draw me to her, although I doubted that she was the kind of person to whom I could talk. That’s why I could hardly conceal my astonishment when I discovered that Lorraine was a very knowledgeable person.

She had something logical and reasonable to answer to any questions. Gingerly, I brought up one subject after another​—mankind, religion, customs, evolution. Finally, I drew a deep breath, thinking this will end it, and asked: “Do you believe in magic?”

No Canadian I had ever known had answered Yes. But Lorraine replied: “I know that magic does exist. The Bible explains that it’s a real power.”

Her response was doubly shocking, not only because of what she believed but because of her authority for believing it. “The Bible?” I said, not believing my ears. “A woman as intelligent as you can believe in the Bible?”

Even priests and ministers, I reminded her, will tell you that the Bible is mostly myth and legend. But Lorraine disarmed me with her tact and kindness. “Would you let me give you something to show you why I rely on the Bible?” From her purse she drew a small, lime-colored book entitled “Is the Bible Really the Word of God?”

I asked, curiously, “What religion are you?” She smiled and answered, “I’m one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.”

I literally shrieked the words​—Jehovah’s Witnesses! But Lorraine asked mildly, “Do you know something about Jehovah’s Witnesses?”

When I acknowledged that I did not, she asked: “Then why did you react that way?”

Dumbfounded, I could not explain. But that night I looked into the book Lorraine gave me. It offered archaeological evidence that there really was a Flood. It assembled proof that mankind appeared on the earth suddenly, in the same form as today, and from one human pair. My skepticism warmed into delight to examine proof that the Bible has been preserved in its purity to our day. A sense of wonder was kindled in me as the book revealed that Bible prophecies are in the course of fulfillment in our time.

Once you find what you have sought for all your life, it comes upon you as incredible. I demanded authentication for every statement. Patiently, Lorraine spent long hours in the library with me researching questions and issues. Every day I confronted her with new questions. Another study aid, Did Man Get Here by Evolution or by Creation?, explained where we came from and where we are going. Another, The Truth That Leads to Eternal Life, answered “Who is God?” “What is God’s purpose for man and the earth?” “Where are the dead?” “How can you identify the true religion?” and other questions.

My World Was Falling Apart

However, no sooner had I resolved to stick to what I was learning than my entire world started to fall apart. My father had just died. A woman crashed into my car and I hobbled on crutches for weeks. My grandmother died. Most of the major appliances in the home broke down. My mother became ill.

But it did not occur to me to stop studying. And Lorraine steadied me by saying, “When you set out to learn about Jehovah you become a personal target of his enemy, Satan the Devil.” I was strengthened by 1 Peter 4:12, which says regarding suffering experienced by followers of Christ: “Beloved ones, do not be puzzled at the burning among you, which is happening to you for a trial.”

Lorraine invited me to the Kingdom Hall of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Though they did not know me, and their life-style was different from mine, their warm love and hospitality engulfed me.

It was apparent to me that I really needed to examine this faith. I wondered: Is this really the way of truth that leads mankind back to harmony with the rest of God’s universe?

I told Lorraine: “I need a part-time job to give me more time for my research.”

One Journey Yet Ahead

All my efforts to find part-time work locally failed. Finally, I confided in Lorraine: “Maybe I could go to some other country and find part-time work there and have time to study.”

“Where,” she asked, “would you like to go?”

“To China.”

She had learned to remain composed no matter what I said, and responded: “Would you settle for Central America?”

Lorraine told me that Diane and Shirley, Jehovah’s Witnesses I had already met, were planning a trip to Guatemala. She took me to talk to them. They did not think my request was preposterous. Soon, we were driving to Guatemala.

My appearance changed with the miles. In Acapulco, Shirley showed me a piece of cloth. “Joy, don’t you think this is a pretty piece of material? Wouldn’t you like it to be made into a dress?” This meant a modest, knee-length dress.

Diane was a professional hairstylist and would show me pictures of different hairstyles. My hair covered most of my face and reached halfway to my hips. Finally, I let her cut it. To my disbelief, when I looked in the mirror and saw the person with the whole face and shoulder-length hair, I liked her!

A Home in Guatemala

In Guatemala, I met Jean. Diane had known her since 1968. Jean first came to Guatemala in 1966 from the Watchtower missionary school in Brooklyn, New York. Although she had become ill, she had remained in Guatemala and now had a little house of her own.

Dear Jean offered me a home with her. And she helped me to find the stranger for whom I was looking. I continued my study of the Bible with her. She would strengthen me by telling me many experiences.

Yes, I was beginning to discern the Stranger, that is, stranger to me. It was the Person who gave meaning and purpose to my life, the generous Giver of every good and perfect gift, my Creator and Life-Giver, the only true God, Jehovah. How awe-inspiring it was to discover that, despite all the seeking and groping, “he is not far off from each one of us”!​—Acts 17:27.

Although I knew very little Spanish, I was already taking care of four Bible students. Jean and I prepared for this ahead of time. She would ask me the Bible questions in English. I would try to answer in Spanish to see if I could relate the information. And we would make sure to stay at least one lesson ahead of my students.

Amid all of this, Jean helped me to get a part-time job as an English instructor. With so many responsibilities, I learned without delay to rely on Jehovah for strength to learn a new language, to learn the truth, to learn to teach the Bible, to learn to teach English, to learn to live in a foreign country, to learn to live a new way of life, and to learn how to put on a new personality.​—Phil. 4:13.

In five months I made my dedication to God to do his will, and was baptized in symbol of that. My doubts were resolved. The long journey in search of God​—the person who had been a stranger to me—​had ended. I now had new goals in life.​—Isa. 2:3.

Rewards That Will Not End

Six wonderful years have flown by. The pace of life continues. I still live with Jean in her little house, and we both teach the Bible full time.

We have been blessed to share the good news of God’s incoming new order with many families and have seen them dedicate their lives to Jehovah. To help new ones to find Jehovah and help them to get on the road to eternal life in his new order is a reward beyond words to describe. As an example, one family of 14 we helped now conducts 59 Bible studies with others, and two of the 14 are spending their full time teaching the Bible to others.

Our secular work, teaching English to Guatemalan executives of American companies, often gives us opportunity to witness to those who have never been reached before. We even have had them request to read in class some of the Watch Tower publications explaining the Bible.​—Matt. 28:19, 20.

When I was born, I was given the name Joy. Now, from the time of my dedication, my life is joy. All because Jehovah is my friend, and not a stranger to me anymore. He is, indeed, the ‘rewarder of those who earnestly seek him.’ (Heb. 11:6)​—Contributed.

“‘You will actually seek me and find me, for you will search for me with all your heart. And I will let myself be found by you,’ is the utterance of Jehovah.”​—Jer. 29:13, 14.